The office of Dr. Gregory House, Princeton-Plainsboro Hospital. Dr. House and staff, Drs. Cameron, Chase, and Forman, assemble to discuss a new case.
House: Who's the patient?
Chase: Route 206 in Hillsborough, southern portion.
House: Symptoms?
Cameron: The artery is almost completely blocked - traffic is barely getting through - weekends are as bad as rush hours.
House: And why do I care about this?
Cameron: They've been working on this for over 30 years - we are their last hope.
House: All right then! What's the differential diagnosis for slow traffic?
Chase: It's obvious - the road is too narrow - there are too many traffic lights, too many driveways. Thru-traffic has nowhere to go.
House: Treatment?
Chase: Just widen the road - 2 lanes in each direction - turn lanes - jughandles - a complete overhaul.
Forman: Can't do it.
Chase: Why not? It's a good plan.
Forman: We can't touch the existing Rt. 206 because Hillsborough is planning on turning that into their "Main Street" - a pedestrian friendly Town Center.
Chase: What? That mess?
Cameron: It won't be a mess once we fix the traffic problem. I think we should bypass 206 completely.
House: Really?
Cameron: Yes - a full four lane elevated divided highway from Old Somerville Rd. to the Montgomery Township Municipal Building.
House: Fine. Only one problem....
What does Dr. House know that the others don't? Log on tomorrow to find out!
Very cute, Greg. Don't want to give away any punchlines, as I'm sure you know the artery now transverses a very different route! :-)
ReplyDeleteDr. Gregory House goes on say..........
ReplyDeleteOne must be careful when operating in Hillsborough, a strange virus there has been know to turn tiny little mole hills into gigantic mountains, while at the same time looking a gift horses square in the mouth.