Now, Clean Your Room!

On Saturday my wife and I celebrated our 17th wedding anniversary. Adding the six years we dated before getting married makes a total of 23 years we have been together - happily!

There are no secrets to a happy marriage, but there are some constants. One constant is negotiation. Sometimes it seems like everything that can be negotiated, will be negotiated. and contrary to what you might have heard, it's not always "win-win".

Before I began this blog entry I spent a few minutes "googling" articles on negotiation. Surprisingly, some of the pieces I read did not even mention the word "compromise". That's hard to understand, since I have always believed that to get something you want, you need to give up something you want. It's a rare person that has everything.

Reading Pamela Sroka's article in Sunday's Courier News got me thinking about how negotiation and compromise played into the current Route 206 bypass proposal. Of the three major players - Hillsborough, Montgomery, and the New Jersey DOT - who gave up the most, and who gained the most with this "comporomise" bypass.

Initially, Hillsborough wanted a four-lane bypass from Belle Mead-Griggstown Rd. to Old Somerville Rd. NJ DOT also wanted this bypass - and they also wanted a four-lane Route 206 from Belle Mead-Griggstown Rd. south to Route 518. Montgomery wanted no bypass through the Pike Run development, and no dualization of Rt. 206 through their town.

Just based on these facts, it is clear that Hillsborough's interests were perfectly compatible with the interests of the DOT. Whereas Montgomery's interests were incompatible with everyone else's.

But it was never just about these facts. There were two other crucial factors that came to the fore near the end of the process - Time and Money! Hillsborough wants the bypass now - NJ DOT wants it cheaper - and Montgomery doesn't care about either of these issues.

In the end, Hillsborough will give up the idea of building the bypass through Pike Run in order to build it sooner. The DOT will give up the idea of a four-lane bypass to build it cheaper - and Montgomery, by default, will get everything it wants.

I guess in this marriage that makes Montgomery the 8 year old daughter. I just hope now that she has everything she wants, she'll clean her room!