December 8, 1980

The following piece is what I wrote in my journal on December 8, 2005 - the 25th anniversary of the death of John Lennon. Very rough - and no Hillsborough content (!) - but here it is anyway.

It is amazing to me to think now that there was a time in my life when every door was open - when the world was wonderful and full of possibilities. When evil only existed in fairytales.

Was I ever really so young - naive - optimistic? I was born five months after JFK was assassinated - and all I knew about Viet Nam was what I read in Mad Magazine. In 1980, there was no tragedy that had ever touched my life. I had lived through no world wars or depressions, as my father had. Parents and grandparents were all alive, no one was ill, no one was divorced. Life was - despite typical teenage traumas - a wonderful journey.

Everything changed on the night of December 8, 1980. Now the world was an evil, dangerous place - where there was no fairness - no justice.

At that time I was a huge Beatles/Lennon fanatic - following all the news, clipping every article on his musical comeback. I was really never bitter or sarcastic before that time - but I recognized right away that I had changed.

How could he be killed? Why? Why NOW? I still find myself asking those questions 25 years later. Two things are clear - the music of John Lennon and The Beatles helped shape the person I am today, and John Lennon's tragic death marked an important turning point in my psychic journey.