Numerically Challenged

There they are. Staring back at you at the supermarket checkout, the bookstore magazine rack, the local newsstand. Countless numbers of, well, numbers!



It seems like you can't look at a magazine cover these days without your eye immediately going to the digits. "365 New Looks for Fall" - "679 Ways to Lose the Weight" - "12,000 Travel Destinations to See Before You Die" - you get the idea.

Editors say this kind of thing works, and readers agree. Apparently, customers - especially in England where 80% of magazine sales are made at the newsstand - respond positively to the numbers hype. Even if it's all part of a game.

No one actually tallies all of the touted tips and tricks. Editors take a look at a few sample pages and extrapolate from there based on how many editorial pages are in the magazine.

Which is actually a much more scientific approach than what I have been using for my 100th, 200th, 300th, and now 400th post! But now you see where I got the idea.

400 Reasons to Clean Up Your Act

Inspired by Hillsborough's upcoming Annual Spring Clean-Up Program and the promise of a big neighborhood garage sale at the end of next month, I decided this week to clean up and clean out the study.

Over the last several months - make that years! - my once spacious retreat has turned into the island of misfit toys. The kids unwanted and unloved playthings competing for space with all kinds of computer peripherals in various states of repair, piles of old bills and tax stuff in need of filing (or shredding), and a seven-foot tower of school board agendas and attachments teetering ominously in the corner.

It got so cluttered I could barely get to my desk to type these blog entries.

But of course the real reason I finally got out the shovel is I will do almost anything to avoid writing when I have nothing to say. And, I guess, even after 399 entries of Gillette on Hillsborough, I still care enough about it to at least TRY to have some real content in every piece.

With the exception of the 400th, apparently!

A Corzine Story

Governor Jon Corzine's budget address was a little like the scene near the end of A Christmas Story where the neighbor's hound dogs have stolen the Christmas turkey right off the kitchen table. Close your eyes and you can almost hear Jean Shepherd narrating - "The heavenly aroma still hung in the State House. But it was gone, all gone! No property tax rebates! No property tax deductions! No property tax decreases! Gone, ALL GONE!"

For Hillsborough residents, the loss of the property tax deduction will hit very hard. The ability to deduct your property tax from your state income tax was the only middle class "loophole" left.

The rich have a million ways to work the system - from trust funds to offshore accounts to shady business ventures to farm assessments on their 100 acre estates. All the middle class taxpayers of Hillsborough had was one lousy deduction.

New Jersey's elite, even with a modest tax increase, still hold onto their Red Rider BB guns. All the rest of us have to settle for TinkerToys.

Hey Jon - Fa Ra Ra Ra Ra Ra to you!

Thinking Time

Believe it or not - and looking back on some of my recent posts I realize you'll have to take my word on this - but writing this blog takes a lot of time.

Not writing time. Thinking time.

I haven't had much time to think about the blog these past few weeks. I have been thinking about the school budget.

Intuition is useful, first impressions are often right on the money, and doing "something" is arguably better than doing "nothing". But for real problem-solving, I don't believe there is any more useful tool than the human brain.

The more time you can devote to a problem, the better the solution will be.

At the very least, you can say you tried!

Just Sign This

Will someone please explain this to me? Why do some doctors, dentists, and other medical professionals require patients to sign a form about privacy? What exactly am I doing by signing it? Isn't this backwards?

It would make more sense for me, as a patient, to come into the doctor's with my OWN form detailing what I expect regarding confidentiality, and have the doctor sign that. I shouldn't need to sign anything. Doctors are flipping around their obligation - making it seem like patients are the ones with the obligation.

Now docs are taking it one step further. Some offices are requiring patients to sign an agreement stating they will not post comments on any of the web sites that rate doctors. No way would I sign something like that - I don't think access to medical care should be contingent upon giving up your first amendment rights!

What do you think?

Over Stimulated

We are living in exciting and suspenseful times. It's the kind of excitement you get from spending a lot of money - or gambling. The Federal stimulus spending and budget plan are nothing if not a huge gamble. It's thrilling to walk up to that one hundred dollar window at the track. The problem is the odds are against us.

Government spending is not a bad thing in concept. After all, we are all in this together, and we are only giving the money to each other. And if we could be sure that none of our tax dollars were going to line the pockets of the well-connected, that would be fine.

But when people say that government spending - especially Federal government spending - is inefficient, this is exactly what they have in mind. The money that goes to pay for a $900 hammer or a $20,000 toilet seat doesn't trickle down to the people who need it. It gets lost somewhere. Someone who knows how to work the system has taken their cut.

The stimulus plan is sure to have a million strings attached. Projects that could have been completed for half the price will now cost double. And forget about anything being completed on time or under budget. There will be no way to give the money back. Every penny will be spent.

Isn't that exciting!

The Other Boat

It might be worth noting, before I move on to something more topical, that the USS Neshanic (AO71) was not the first vessel to bear that moniker. There was a 271 ton steam ship by that name built at Cornwallis, Nova Scotia in 1870.

Sailing out of New York, the 134 ft. merchant freighter Neshanic, crew of six, was still plying the trade routes as late as the 1920s, and possibly longer.

USS Neshanic

It took a little digging, but I finally found a photo of the actual USS Neshanic (AO71). Here she is in 1943 before heading for the Pacific.

It's a Mardi Gras Miracle!

Just call it "Lean Tuesday". With their announcement on February 24 that property taxes will go down, the Somerset County Freeholders have finally taken the fat out of Mardi Gras!

County Freeholders Robert Zaborowski and Peter Palmer are attempting to fulfill a campaign promise for 5-percent cuts across county departments, and this has largely been accomplished - resulting in an overall budget decrease of 2.63 percent.

So how did they do it? It took reducing appropriations for over 600 line-items, and significantly, not filling 30 vacant positions - a move that saved $1.4 million all by itself.

But essentially it took a conservative approach to fiscal planning - not expanding too rapidly when the money was rolling in so there would be no desperate contraction during a crisis. According to the Freeholders, the budget is designed to ride out a three-year economic downturn.

Budgets aside, what taxpayers in Somerset County care about is the overall tax levy. This too would decrease - by about a million dollars - resulting in a reduced tax rate, and, lower taxes!

Somerset County homeowners could see their wallets expand by about $20 next year.

I wonder how many beaded necklaces you can buy for twenty bucks!

New Jersey's Soul Train

Does today's busy world offer Christians no time to observe the traditional forty days of penance leading up to Easter known as Lent? Are dietary prohibitions too strict? Is a six week period of fasting and humility too long to sustain? And what about people on the move, commuters unable to attend church services?

4 March 1965 Asbury Park Press

Interesting questions. Today, and when they were first asked in a Time Magazine article in March of 1965!

Luckily for the harried sixties commuter, two New Jerseyans were ready with solutions. Rev. Craig Biddle of Morristown's St. Peter's Episcopal Church turned the last car of the Erie-Lackawanna's morning commuter train into a chapel on wheels. On Ash Wednesday, March 3, 1965, the 7:17 pulled out of the Morristown station with a full-fledged church in place of a caboose! New Jersey's original Soul Train!

11 February 1965 Courier News

And what of Hillsborough's commuters? According to a New York Times article from 13 February 1965, there was help for them as well. Rev. Raymond C. Ortman, the pastor of the Neshanic Reformed Church, revealed plans that same week for converting part of the parking lot on the eastern side of the church into a drive-in area where parishioners could park and attend services without getting out of their cars.

18 April 1965 Home News

Slated to open on April 4, the drive-in church would have six parking spaces, sound speakers, and heaters. Hymn books and church bulletins would be placed in racks, presumably at car window height. No need to get out of your seat to be saved!

One Step Forward, No Steps Back for GSA Depot

Hillsborough Township is one step closer to acquiring the 369 acre Belle Mead GSA Depot now that Governor Corzine has signed off on the Finding of Suitability for Early Transfer. This document allows the property to be transferred from the federal government to Hillsborough before environmental remediation has taken place.

During the three years that it has taken to get to this point, some have commented that we should be getting this property for free - all clean and ready to go. I have been unable to conclude whether or not that is true, but I do know one thing - if we waited for the feds to clean up the depot, we could be waiting decades.

The purchase price of approximately $16 million will be used to clean the site, and work can begin as soon as the transfer is complete.

Despite questions and lawsuits, Hillsborough is right on track with this project. Every bit of news so far has been positive, with no setbacks. Let's hope that lasts.

Time for a Wheel Deal?

The Motor Vehicle Commission is looking to raise fees for some of its services, including motorcycle registrations and document copying. Some fees haven't gone up in years, and could rise substantially - 500% or more. The increases are expected to raise $40 to $60 million per year.

Maybe this would be a good time to revamp the driver's license fees also. As I wrote a couple of years ago, the $24/4 year driver's license is a bargain - maybe too much of a bargain. Why not a $100/10 year license? The state would get an instant increase of $4 dollars per driver per year, and a tremendous savings on processing costs - as driver's license renewal is one of the functions that can't be performed through the internet or by mail. And drivers would only need to renew their licenses half a dozen times or so in their lifetime.

How about a youth driver's license for ages 17 to 21, and a full driver's license starting on one's twenty-first birthday. Renewals at age 31, 41, 51, 61 - and a renewal with road test at 71, and - hopefully 81!

What do you think?

Chinese Innovation?

I caught part of a television show on the Discovery Channel about China's highways. The premise seemed to be that China was copying the US interstate highway system almost exactly - even down to the numbering of routes and the color of the signs - and doing it better!

I was especially intrigued by the plan of the beltways and connecting highways of the Shanghai metropolitan area. The schematic shown looked something like this:

The show touted this unique plan of inner and outer looped highways, and praised the Chinese for their innovation. But I knew I had seen this map before. It's the Regional Plan for New York from 1929!

I especially like that road from Somerville to the Shore. Is that Route 92?

But I Don't Even Work Here!

There was a notable episode of 90s sitcom "Seinfeld" where Kramer ended up accidentally working - without actually being hired or getting paid - at some generic corporate office. He proceeded to turn in incomprehensible reports, and was called into the boss's office to be fired. His only explanation, "I don't even really work here!" To which the boss replied, "That's what makes this so hard."

At least Kramer got some notice.

It appears that the Courier News have cut Gillette on Hillsborough from the free Community Courier newspaper that is delivered to mailboxes weekly.

Judging from the exclusion of my blog excerpt these past few weeks, it appears I have been permanently replaced by a column written by one of the editors. Can't be a money-saving measure, because, like Kramer, I don't really work there.

I hope this new column continues to get the same good community response that I have been receiving - from Hillsborough residents who don't read the daily paper or use the internet - who found my blog by reading Communtiy Courier each week.

Science Faire

The Hillsborough Elementary School Science Fair that took place a couple of weeks ago was a real treat - and an eye opener. I don't remember ever participating in one of these when I was in school, and hadn't been to one in years. The students' chosen topics were fascinating, and it was great to see such a tremendous turnout - approximately 135 students creating displays for the fair.

Of course the best part was watching my own first-grader explain his project to one of the dozen or so judges who examined each student's work. A real thrill!

Blow Your Horn

On a recent visit back to my hometown of Freehold Township, I noticed a large sign alongside one of the county roads adjacent to a large tract of open space.


Upon closer inspection, it turned out to be a sign touting Freehold Township's impressive record of preserving open space. The town has quite a number of commercial and retail centers, and oodles of housing developments, but has still managed to put 37% of the town into some type of open space preservation.

The signs are a cool idea, and one Hillsborough Township - or Somerset County, for that matter - should consider. It's nice to drive around here and see those "preserved farmland" signs, but they are quite small and don't really tell the whole story.

If there is one thing I would change about Freehold's signs it would be the inclusion of the township committee members names. Sorry guys, and gal, even though I went to high school with some of you and got a kick out of seeing your names up there, this achievement can be appreciated on its own for what it is. You don't need to blow your horns too!

If It's Yellow....

First question: How often do you flush? Second question: Do you think you're getting your money's worth?

Montgomery Township officials obviously felt that many residents were not getting their money's worth when it comes to their sewer bills. After all, sewer usage is based on how much water you run down your drains - but all residents had been paying one flat fee of $850, no matter how may times they flushed or how long they showered.

Montgomery's new billing system, which went into effect January 1, is based directly on how much water is used at each home. Now, about 70% of residents should be paying under $850 - some as low as $541. High end users - unquestionably those who let the water run while shaving or brushing - could pay as much as $1562.

This seems fair to me, and could conceivably lead to water conservation - always a good idea.

Good job Montgomery. This idea gets four out of five plungers on the happy bathroom scale!

The Most Important Meal

This Sunday my family and I enjoyed the last regularly scheduled brunch at Old Man Rafferty's on Route 206 at the Triangle Center. The few times I have had brunch there over the last few years I have enjoyed it very much, and Sunday was no exception. I'm sorry to see that they have decided to end this regular service, although they will still be serving Sunday brunch on selected holidays.

I am pleased to see that Red Wagon Gourmet have reopened for business after flooding caused by a faulty sprinkler shut down operations in December. Also interesting to note that they are now including more healthy food choices, and are offering an expanded breakfast menu.

And finally, one of my favorites, the Plaza Deli on Route 206 at the Mountainview Plaza is now open on Sundays from 8 until 2. With apologies to IHOP - which is another excellent breakfast choice that I couldn't leave out of this blog - Plaza Deli has the tastiest pancakes in Hillsborough. And their other menu items are delicious as well.

Can't wait till the weekend!

USS Neshanic - Hillsborough's 21,000-Ton War Hero

Much has been written about our state's famous namesake battleship, New Jersey. She is the most decorated battleship in naval history, having participated in World War II, the Korean War, the Vietnam War, and the Lebanese Civil War of 1983/1984.

The USS Neshanic at sea

Less is commonly known about Hillsborough Township's own namesake warship, the USS Neshanic (AO-71), one of five Chiwawa Class oilers named for rivers with Native American names. Oilers are used for refueling and for transporting petroleum products.

USS Neshanic sailing under the Oakland Bay Bridge

Built in 1942 at the Bethlehem Shipyard in Sparrows Point, Maryland, the USS Neshanic was commissioned on 20 February 1943 and saw service in the Pacific during World War II. It was the second American ship to bear that name. The first was a 271-ton steamship built in Cornwallis, Nova Scotia, in 1870. The coastal freighter sailed out of New York plying the trade routes up and down the east coast and was still in service as late as the 1920s.

The bridge of the USS Neshanic, off Saipan, July 1944.
Damage from the June 18, 1944, engagement can be seen,
as well as two small painted Japanese flags
signifying the Neshanic's two kills during the battle

Neshanic's most meritorious moment came on 18 June 1944 off of Saipan. For about two hours that afternoon, Neshanic and other support ships were under continuous Japanese air attack. At 4:42 P.M. she took a direct hit from a 100-pound bomb, which landed on the cargo deck, but luckily did not pierce the deck through to the fuel tanks.

The "Frantic News Antics" newsletter 1 February 1945
(collection of Gillette on Hillsborough)

Thirty-three crew members were injured fighting the ensuing fires, which were quickly brought under control. Neshanic then exacted her revenge - gun crews were able to bring down two Japanese planes.

20 February 1945 Purple Heart Ceremony program
(collection of Gillette on Hillsborough)

The USS Neshanic received nine Battle Stars for service in the war before being decommissioned on 19 December 1945. She was later sold to the Gulf Oil Corporation, sailing as the SS Gulfoil, until the damage caused by a collision with a tanker off of Rode Island in 1958 precipitated a sale to the Pioneer Steamship Company.

Sailing as the SS Gulfoil, circa the 1950s.

Pioneer repaired the damaged ship, lengthening it from 500 to 730 feet, and converting it to a straight deck bulk carrier for service on the Great Lakes. In 1962 she was sold to the Oglebay Norton Company and renamed SS Middletown.

SS Middletown

In 2006 she was sold to Liberty Steamship Company and renamed SS American Victory.

SS American Victory

In December 2017, Hillsborough's 21,000-ton war hero was sold a final time to Algoma Central and was subsequently towed through the Great Lakes and St. Lawrence Seaway to make its way to a Turkish scrapyard.

Happy Valentine's Day from the USS Neshanic

What to do on Valentine's Day? Tough enough question for those of us who are ABLE to spend the day with our significant other. What about those who are somehow separated from their loved ones on February 14?

For the sailors aboard the USS Neshanic cruising the Pacific during World War II, a Valentine's Day Card to their sweethearts stateside was a must.

The card below is typical of the kind sent from naval ships in the Pacific. The front is designed to make the hometown girls jealous. Inside might be a poem like, "Every day I see something new, but every night I'm dreaming of you."

Something new, indeed!

Happy Valentine's Day!

No Elbow Room? I wish!

So what set off yesterday's blog? Space. Personal space.

I'm not generally one of those people who needs a zone around myself. I enforce no three-second-rule for those who linger in my "lane". I have rubbed shoulder to shoulder with strangers on airplanes, and had my arm sat on by a woman "standing" in the aisle of a New Jersey Transit bus.

But there's a limit.

Just before the start of my son's first grade music concert last week, I was sat on by a woman in the folding chair next to me. She turned away from me to speak with her friends, and placed her butt literally on top of my thigh.

The chairs were close together - I had no place to go even if I managed to extract my leg from underneath her cheeks. I looked over at my wife on the other side of me and said, "Look what's going on over here."

Her advice: Push the woman off.

I don't know why, but I couldn't bring myself do it.

Upon seeing my lack of nerve, my darling wife began to exert pressure on me from the other side in an attempt to start these dominoes falling! No luck.

Mercifully, the chair-challenged woman straightened around when the show began a few minutes later.

How Not to Succeed in Business

My dad liked to tell the story of how one of his co-workers, Harvey, at the General Cigar Company in New York City got fired from his job. This was back in the late sixties, early seventies, when any half-decent employee basically had a job for life - you really had to screw up to get canned.

Dad was an accountant working out of the company's corporate headquarters in Manhattan. His main duties consisted of preparing the quarterly and annual reports, and other aspects of consolidations. In the era before computers, number-crunching was actually labor intensive - teams of accountants with gigantic calculators and primitive room-filling photo-copiers.

Telecommuting consisted of a spreadsheet the size of one of the Santa Maria's sails spread out on the dining room table, Dad peering in, a ball point pen with the finest point ever created poised above a tiny green cell.

Dad definitely had a creative side, which you wouldn't think would be important in accounting, but was indispensable. He could make one plus one equal three, if that's what the bosses wanted. He did a good job there for over 30 years. He was well-liked, respected, and never stepped on anyone's toes.

The same can't be said for hapless Harv. Oh, I'm sure he was well-liked, and may have been respected by his peers - but he stepped on a lot of toes.

That's not a metaphor. He actually stepped on people's toes! Apparently this went on for years - he couldn't keep his feet to himself! Until one day when the boss had had enough - Harvey and his size elevens had to go!

Imagine trying that today. I'm sure "clumsy feet" is a protected medical condition covered by the Americans with Disabilites Act.

Comcast Raises Rates!

It was just about a year ago that I wrote a blog entry titled Patriot Media Raises Rates!. That was at the end of 2007, and I was more than annoyed that Patriot was justifying the increase by touting expanded offerings for many of its packages, but was giving me nothing for the 3% increase in my service.

Last year brought a new cable company to town, and now a new rate increase. And this increase is even more exasperating than last year's, because they are trying to blame it on me!

Well, not ME specifically - at least I don't think so!

My January 15 bill has a note on Page One which reads:

"Effective 12/29/08, you made changes to your account. See the following page for more details."

What! O.K., let's see what's on the following page:

"Effective 12/29/08, you removed Expanded Service at $38.50 per month. You added Expanded Basic at $48.50 per month."

No. I did no such thing! Which is exactly what I told Customer Service Representative Chevelle when I called for clarification several days later. "Why would I charge myself ten dollars more for exactly the same service?", I explained.

After waiting on hold for several minutes, the young woman informed me that, indeed, I had not changed my service or initiated a rate change in any way - this was really a rate increase. It only reads like it is my fault - but I'm not to blame at all.

Thanks for the explanation Chevelle - I'm sure it's not easy to have to answer for such a deceitful company - one that would try to pass off rate increases by blaming it on bogus customer-initiated service changes.

And is it a coincidence that my rates went up on December 29 - exactly one year after I wrote about the previous rate increase?

I wonder.

Fluff

Click here to read the short piece about snow that ran in the New York Times 25 years ago.

The story really isn't about Eskimos. It's about TV weathermen.

And it's ALL fluff, really!

Snow!

Eskimos do not have 100 words for "snow". This myth has its origin in the 1911 book "The Handbook of North American Indians", by anthropologist Franz Boas, who likens the different Eskimo words for snow to the different English words for water, such as "lake" or "river". But even Franz doesn't credit the Inuit with 100 words for the white stuff.


The story of the Eskimo snow was exaggerated from seven words in 1940 to fifty by 1978.



It took a New York Times editorial, 25 years ago today, to put the final figure on the urban myth: 100!



I suppose the idea is that all cultures are rich and vibrant. All human experiences are rewarding. All people are wealthy. Even the Eskimo, who sees only snow and ice, can have an enriching life experience expressed through language. Hence, 100 words for snow!

All wrong! Cultures around the world can be rich, vibrant, rewarding - but they don't need to be expressed with language. That's our own Western bias coming out.

And by the way, there are many more words for snow in English than there are in any of the Inuit languages. Do you know any?

Historic Move

This is a photo I took on January 3, 2009 just several days before the 5000 square foot two-story barn at the corner of Route 206 and Raider Boulevard was moved onto its new foundation.

 

The barn dates back to the 19th century, and the carriage house visible in the distance was built in the mid 1700s. Can you make out the barn and carriage house in this 1931 aerial photo of the area? The road running north and south is Route 206 - called Route 31 back then - and Raider Boulevard would be in the vicinity of the black line that runs east-west through the photo.

Both buildings will remain on the site, becoming part of the new retail-office complex. Read more here.